Thirty-something adult carrying a doll in a clear backpack

Hi,

I’m going to the Otakuthon in Montréal and there’s a portion of the event that’s dedicated to Asian dolls and I’m sort of dreading people’s reactions towards my bringing a doll in transit and during the convention. I’d like to show I’m part of the doll community amongst ‘’my peers’’ but I don’t want to be singled out because I’m plastering myself with what would be considered a child’s play thing. I don’t want to be considered like a mental case or a sideshow anywhere I go with my Smart Doll but I still want the fun of showing what I love because there are no clubs, associations or doll-related events in my province and I'm really excited about seeing other people who like what I like.

Am I the only person to have the heebie-jeebies about something like this ?

Help ?

Awww, I'm sorry you feel this way.  I can't relate to such social anxiety cos I proudly have carried my bjds around anywhere and everywhere daily to concerts, business meetings, Dr appts, restaurants etc.  There was no limit!  Of course you'll get people who make snide comments, but you also meet those genuinely curious and think you're cool!  Okay, it takes a lot of courage, but there's a bunch of us supportive of your hobbies even if can't be there in person.  P.S.  I'm in my 40's and have been doing this for over a decade, may this story give you courage as well to not give an F what other's think or say about your passions!  Also, if it helps, just think of how many places Danny Choo has brought his Smartdolls all over the world as well?   

You could always carefully wrap your Smart Doll and pack her in something opaque and less conspicuous if you didn't want her to be seen throughout the convention, then take her out and hold her when you did. The thing is though, with that many people attending an event in the area, if somebody in passing wears something even moderately weird, most people will assume they're going to con. So you wouldn't look particularly 'out of place'. Especially with the rise of ita bags- people stuff whole plushies into those, and I've seen pictures of Dollfies in them. There will be cosplayers, there will be wacky hats, folks with loud fandom t-shirts proudly on display, alternative fashion people...  and I say this because I live in an area with no doll community and a tiny population, yet our wee cons manage to bring out all these other things, just in smaller quantity. We have fursuits, we have Mandolorians and troopers from the 501st. We have a chap who brings a life-sized Tardis. A doll in a bag isn't going to stand out as overly 'weird' at Otakuthon, though you might get some questions about her.  Plus, there will be other people with dolls there too by the sound of it.

At the only 'big' con I ever went to, both a vendor and some guests brought their BJDs and Dollfies, and that was my first time seeing them in-hand. I even got to touch, and that remains one of the 'big' memories over a decade after. A couple of years later, I found out at a cross-state doll meet that someone whose work I'd enjoyed in the artist alley there was actually a member of that particular doll community. In fact, she owned one of my favorite dolls on the community forum. Dolls can be anywhere; truthfully, I think a lot of us are self-conscious, so we pass by each other undetected.

The one thing I would be concerned about is making sure not to let her out of your sight. While I've had no bad experiences yet, dolls do attract attention. Most people will just look for a moment and then move on, but I've read a couple of not-so-happy accounts of folks who got grabby. However, those are few and far between, and truthfully, I can count on one hand the amount of 'con doll horror stories' I've seen in fifteen years without using all five fingers. If you want to go and see and be seen, please don't let other people deter you. It's not worth letting that concern steal your joy. I guarantee there will be others there who look far 'sillier' by general standards than you. Especially at an event this large.

 

I'm not going to tag them, as they should comment freely if they feel inclined, but Oculae        has taken dolls in a see-through container to events on occasion. You're definitely not alone!

I don’t think you have to worry. People there tend to keep to themselves, so I doubt anyone will say anything to you about her. If you’re worried, keep her covered while in transit, only displaying her during the con.

Edited Monday at 01:44 AM by ragnamuffin

I think you have nothing to worry about but covering her while in transit is a good alternative. Overall I usually get good/neutral results while in transit, but then again I am not from Montreal. (30-something too, badass biker with sometimes a doll in a clear backpack too xD). But honestly, be proud of your hobbies. the "normal" is boring.

6 hours ago, Resilient said:

I’d like to show I’m part of the doll community amongst ‘’my peers’’ but I don’t want to be singled out because I’m plastering myself with what would be considered a child’s play thing.

I was slightly concerned about this when I began the hobby too.

Most people outside the hobby immediately notice the craft work put into these dolls and realise they're not a simple toy. Often it's the first time they have ever seen inset eyes and such thick, luscious hair on a doll. They are vaguely familiar with the concept of doll craft & doll collecting even if they're not in the hobby themselves.

There is also a huge community of doll enthusiasts in the West. It's a surprisingly common hobby and not limited to a subculture at all! Even grandmothers and librarians take part in it.

Typically western enthusiasts focus on 1/6 fashion dolls like Blythe, Barbie and Monster High, but there's a lot of overlap with BJDs, and semi-real Smart Dolls are becoming popular with the fashion doll community too. 

If anything, the average person thinks dolls are wasted on children who pull out its hair and scribble on its face. 

 

Edited July 18 by meteorite

I see I've been mentioned already! 😂

I can do one better than the example Nefarious gave, it's been a few years since then! I took a doll to a furniture store recently, no event in sight.

I needed to buy a new doll cabinet, but the option I was going to go with was sold out! So I took Miku with me to Ikea, and the only good bag I had for her was my uchinoko kawaii bag from Volks, so off we went!

We went on a sunday afternoon, so it was pretty crowded, and I hauled her all over that Ikea. I even took her out a few times to test how she fit and looked in several of their cabinet options, so I was extremely conspicuous. More than even I'm usually comfortable with!

Yknow how many people commented on her? Two.

One was a slightly older woman than me (maybe in her 40s, about?) shopping for bookshelves at the same time, who was absolutely fascinated by her and asked me a bunch of questions about who made her and what the hobby was like and who made the bag...I was honest with her, and she walked away delighted by the whole thing.

The other was a MUCH older woman working at the checkout (I ended up buying the cabinet Miku's in, but in black!), and SHE was so delighted by Miku that I was kicking myself for not bringing my "here's my website" business cards! Adored the bag, adored Miku AND her outfit, complimented me profusely, I was showing her pictures of the crew...absolutely the nicest doll-in-public interaction I've ever had.

I'm sure more people saw me, an almost-30 adult, hauling a big toy anime girl around the furniture store, and maybe some of them thought it was strange, or cringe, but only the truly obnoxious would ever consider voicing that...and those kinds of people would find a way to be a dick anyway, so you really shouldn't be listening to them regardless. Most people keep their opinions to themselves, positive or negative. Those that do say something are rare, and the vast majority of it I've experienced is positive.

I've been in the hobby for over 5 years now, hauling dolls in some kind of clear bag the whole time, and the only negative comment I ever got was from a teenage boy who thought he was being funny. And as a 30-something...do you really care about the opinion of a teenage boy who thinks being cruel is a good joke? 😆

If you're really worried, you can totally take a baby step for your first outing and keep her in an opaque bag until you get to the con. No shame in that! But if you ARE interested in showing your girl off...I encourage you to give it a try! I think you'll be pleasantly surprised. ☺️

(And just for fun...I did make a second trip to that Ikea, months later...for a doll meet, of all things. First one they ever did there! Sinclair and Verdi were well received there too.)

You're going to a convention. There are people who are going to be in full cosplay. A doll is nothing! I just went to a convention recently and I carried my Frieren around in the clear dollfie carry bag. She got lots of complements!

I have a half-clear carrying bag for a single doll, and during transit is have the clear opening turned around facing my "back;" and when I'm at the convention with all the other doll people, turn it around so everyone can see the doll! That's what I do. I don't want everyone seeing doll whenever I'm just wondering the streets either, so that's how I personally solved that issue. 😁

I haven't personally brought my dolls anywhere, but I have made myself way more conspicuous and "childish" than that in public. I've worn a kigurumi around a college campus before, and also toted around stuffed animals to doctor's appointments and the like. The only comment I've ever received was a Starbucks barista who asked if the stuffed animal I was carrying was handmade (it was! ^u^). What I mean to say by this is that generally rude people will keep to themselves, and I find carrying around or wearing strange things actually helps with my social anxiety? It's a kind of armor for me, where if I see someone staring I go "Oh, it's because of the outfit/stuffed animal" and move on, without wondering "Oh god what are they thinking of me"