First Date: Would you tell a first date about your dolls?

If on a first date, would you tell him or her about your dolls?

 

Myself being a single, older male, I would say 'no' unless my date happened to bring up the topic of dolls. Even then I would first have to find out more about what she feels about dolls and, if she collects them, what kinds of dolls. Of course, if I had a sense things between us were heading towards a closer relationship after a few more dates I would certainly tell her.

 

I am not ashamed of my dolls, but I know some women would find it odd that I have them and I see no reason to mention them on a first date (again, unless the topic is brought up by her).

When I was single (am definitely not now ), I think I mentioned that I collected dolls in the 1st or 2nd line of my online dating profile. It was just a quick comment, maybe six or seven words in total, before moving on to describe my other hobbies and my personality.

 

That said, I wouldn't bring it up on the first or second date. If the person asked, I'd explain a bit more, but otherwise I'd wait until they came over to my place (third date, usually), and during a quick tour it would be "And here's the kitchen, and this is the room where the giant spooky dolls live, and here's the bathroom..."

 

I always talked about my dolls in a very casual and matter-of-fact manner, and acted as if collecting dolls was as common as collecting stamps or baseball cards. And I can't remember a single time anyone ever made a big deal out of it, or even said anything more negative than "Those are weird dolls" (Answer: "Yup, they are" + new subject).

 

Of course, I have the benefit of being a girl so doll collecting is a bit more socially acceptable, but it's still not considered a "sexy" or "attractive" activity.

 

I'm now living with a great guy who doesn't mind the dolls, so it worked out for me.

On a first date. probably not. unless I knew they were into things like that beforehand. I'm sure as the relationship progressed they would know about it one way or another so I'd eventually tell them about it. I imagine by then they would probably know me well enough to accept it. If not, I guess it wasn't meant to be.

I was never the kind to date "casually", and I can't imagine dating somebody I didn't already know pretty well to begin with, and know I share a number of interests with, so I'm pretty sure it would already have been a subject of conversation. Also, as I could only see myself dating with the intention of a stable long-term relationship, I would want any kind of potential "deal breakers" on the table right from the beginning to save everybody from nasty surprises later on.

 

That being said, I really don't think I could ever handle the whole dating thing again. I'd more likely end up as a hermit.

First date? Nope. Second? Prolly not. Third? Depends on how things have gone so far, then maybe.

 

 

Billy

If we have similar interests, I'd bring it up on the second date. Otherwise, it may take a long time. It's a lot harder to approach people about it that are not into anime or figurines. If they collect figures, I think it's probably understandable why I have dolls.

But they're not dolls, they're dollfies!

Is the other person a vampire or not?

 

I'm kidding. I have no idea. In terms of meeting new coworkers, someone usually says something about my DDs before I do.

No idea, but this not that important thing that will affect for a relationship unless your partner is afraid of doll, I heard some people afraid of dolls with human shape and it's a common phobia.

but rather than telling I think it's much better when finally he/she find out and you can see the "first reaction", unless you cazy enough to carry your dollfies on first date

I wouldn't tell them on the first date. I figure that I tell them when we know each other a bit better or if I invited them to my place.

Limited DD make good investment too. Since paper currency is fiat these days, and everybody is printing, investing in dollfies makes financial sense too.

Normally I probably wouldn't tell someone on a first date but I had a date recently the night I just got back from a long distance trip for a doll meet and my date asked why I had taken the trip. I'm terrible at lying on the spot like that so I told him and showed him some pictures from the meet. He kind of laughed it off and poked a bit of fun at me but I suppose it's more socially acceptable for a girl to collect dolls. The way I see it, I'd rather someone like me for exactly who I am than waste both our time. But, I'm pretty secure with myself so I don't feel like I need validation from others to like what I like. Anyone who'd put you down for it without even learning about it isn't worth your time.

The way I see it, I'd rather someone like me for exactly who I am than waste both our time. But, I'm pretty secure with myself so I don't feel like I need validation from others to like what I like. Anyone who'd put you down for it without even learning about it isn't worth your time.

 

I'm in total agreement there...

 

I'm out of the "dating scene" completely, so that means I probably wouldn't find find someone, unless it's at a DD meet to begin with.

 

*Which could mean a double/triple date, depending on how many Kiddos we'd each bring!*

 

(Yeah, "Perfect World Scenario" and all that, but, it's still nice to dream about it, right?)

Best case scenario they would share this hobby with me or would be into figures so they would definitely already know.

However, if someone has asked me out then at some point they would already know I am into a variety of odd hobbies and to expect that coming. I'm very forward. You take what you get, that's that. I'm not into wasting mine or others times, or brushing around the bush in general. They don't have to get it, but if that makes or break a relationship then it wasn't much of one in the first place.

Best case scenario they would share this hobby with me or would be into figures so they would definitely already know.

However, if someone has asked me out then at some point they would already know I am into a variety of odd hobbies and to expect that coming. I'm very forward. You take what you get, that's that. I'm not into wasting mine or others times, or brushing around the bush in general. They don't have to get it, but if that makes or break a relationship then it wasn't much of one in the first place.

 

^ This

 

Also being into dolls is seen as a weird hobby by everyone, especially by people who are not into IDK comics/anime/manga and such. But isn't it time for us to break that "weird barrier" and just be cool with it? Why do we even feel that we must tell our date like it's a big dark secret that we must hide. Just be proud of yourself and your collection, and one day you'll find a partner that's either into the hobby or just accepts it. (:

Also being into dolls is seen as a weird hobby by everyone, especially by people who are not into IDK comics/anime/manga and such. But isn't it time for us to break that "weird barrier" and just be cool with it? Why do we even feel that we must tell our date like it's a big dark secret that we must hide. Just be proud of yourself and your collection, and one day you'll find a partner that's either into the hobby or just accepts it. (:

 

I see nothing wrong with my hobby (obviously), but I do get a general feeling that, sure, not socially acceptable for adults to have dolls, yada, yada, yada.

Screw them, we're "rebels," we're awesome. Everyone should be able to stand proud about their hobbies (no matter how "bizarre" or "out there.") and hey, if someone who is into you thinks "oh god they have dolls, 2 scary 4 me" then they aren't worth our times. Cause remember, you're all awesome. ;3

If the subject of hobbies comes up then sure. But I'd probably not bring it up on my own. I'm generally pretty open and casual about my hobbies so, if the topic came up it'd be "I collect dolls, like these kinda big anime action figure dolls, and I'm learning to sew, so I sew clothes for them instead of buy them . .." and the conversation would continue on.

 

I feel the bigger deal you make out of something the more of a chance someone has to get creeped out lol. If they're creeped out to the point they stop talking to you at the mention of it, then as much as it might suck, they weren't meant to be in your life, and that's something that it's better to find out up front rather than down the line.

I met my husband through an internet dating site called geek to geek, and I had just put BJDs among my other interests on my profile. Before we met, we talked ALOT on AIM and FB. He asked me more about them, and I told him whatever he wanted to know. He thought they were cool and accepted my hobby. When he first saw them, he was like cool and that was that lol. He never dissed me for having them (btw, I had resins at the time) and respected that it is my hobby.

 

Fast forward 2 years later, he gets interested in them, and we get him resin dolls. Fast forward to year three of marriage, and we have Dollfie Dreams and he loves them lol! He loves writing stories about them, and picking out cute outfits, etc. with me.

 

I think the most important thing is to never push anything on anyone, and just to be casual about it. And a good thing with DDs is that if the other person is nerdy, they might think it's really cool to eventually see a DD cosplay of like their favorite anime, game, etc.

On my first date with my current boyfriend, I told him that I painted resin dolls. Then he told me that he painted resin Gundams. We talked about how the process for customizing both dolls and Gundams are really similar-- same sealants (Mr. Super Clear), techniques (airbrushing, acrylic paints for fine lines, pastel for soft color details), and the crossover between the fandoms (Gentaro Araki uses Gundam pens for some of the early Unoa customs). We've been dating for five years now, and we often spend our weekends working on our respective hobbies side by side. uwu I think it really works out to be honest, because you might find something surprising by giving a little to get a little.

I would and I did. I know that a lot of people think of doll collecting as something weird and 99% of them assume you still play with Barbies at such and such age. The reactions will be different depending on the person, but as long as someone is willing to get it to their head that these in fact are not some play-line toys and won't offend the hobby or me, I'm fine with it. I don't expect anyone to like dolls or be super passionate about them. All I want is some respect for my choices.

If the guy is an ignorant with no respect to anyone or anything and dolls creep the poop out of him, then it wouldn't work anyway. There is no way I would justify my hobbies for a sake of relationship.

As others said before me, there is no point in wasting your time on dating someone whom is clearly not a person that you can build a strong and comfortable relationship with.

I only recently purchased my first Dollfie Dream but I have collected other BJDs for a long time. It's always something that comes up pretty close to the start of relationship as it is a big part of my life and if they are uncomfortable with it enough to not want to be with me then there is no point investing the time.

 

My current partner knew about my dolls due to the fact I brought them with me to several conventions we went to together before becoming partners. I am just getting into Dollfie dreams and he has become fascinated with their cute anime style and has actually been looking into them himself!

My boyfriend is lovely and he's quite open minded about my hobbies, but when I first met him at college he was the one who spoke to me first and at the time I was watching Gundam and he told me he collected figures, so I half-heartedly exposed my love for dolls I couldn't afford.

 

But then again, if it was someone else I'd stay silent until they mentioned something similar to my hobbies. I don't know if that's just because I'm shy or not though

My now ex (sadness, I still can't get over him ) was great and really understanding and tolerated my doll rants. I hope I can find someone else like that.

Edited November 17, 2013 by Guest

I don't really tell anyone my fascination for dolls except if they're into it too. I'll only tell them if they ask me about my hobbies. I don't shunt away people who are not impressed with the hobby. I just let them be. We all have our preferences.

Most of my friends don't friends don't even know about my doll collection! Since I have a wide variety of interests (classical music & lit, Star Wars, science, anime, and dolls), when I would mention my dolls would greatly depend in which realm of interests that I first got along well with the girl. That said, once the relationship progressed to a reasonable point, I would show her my collection; so that she isn't left to imagine what they look like or how they are displayed.

 

Personally, it would be great if I did find a girl cool with dolls because it would be a lot easier to do outside photoshoots.